What humans really want..?

What human beings really want? Money, health, sex, good looks and good physique…  Not really, as a matter of fact human beings look for only one thing- 'assurance'. It seems that humans are more desperate to get assurance rather than getting the actual thing, for happiness is often misconstrued as guarantee. And because of this most tension in this world is caused not by actual incidents but at the junctures where this assurance seems to be diluted.

            Right from the time when you join kindergarten and are still lisping your uncle asks you, "my dear what would become when you grow up?" As you are taught triumphantly by adults to be a doctor, a banker, etc., you promptly answer to be one among these. The impressed look of the adults inspiringly convinces you to think over one of these career options. But why does it look impressive to be a banker, a doctor, a public officer or the like. It is not necessary that everybody who chooses to be one of them is successful. Then what brings contentment on the face of the kid’s parents every time when their he/she merely repeats to be say a doctor. It’s not the prospects but reassurance what brings happiness to the parents.

An event in which people go crazy making preparation for it seems to be the most important day in one’s life- marriage.  Marriage essentially union of two people, irrespective of any culture is a pompous and much awaited occasion all over the world. Logically, the day when you discover and find someone to love and be loved should be the happiest day of your life. But people feel more gratified on the day of marriage instead. Conventional marriages consists of rituals, wherein the bride and the groom enter in to a contract or a vow in front of all whom they know and declare to be faithful and committed to each other. Ultimately, it’s the assurance that is what one is deriving out of the whole ceremony which makes the occasion momentous for them.

Before reaching the stage of marriage, there seems to be an emotional war in orthodox families. The grown-up kid has now found a compatible partner to be with. But this doesn't convince the parents for them it is to move out of their comfort zone of not following the traditional way. And they back their opposition in the name of the caste, tradition, religion, horoscope and even go to the heights of giving haphazard logics as if the nubile at this age has hormonal problems because of which he has started his puberty late by ten-fifteen years because according to them the feeling which he has towards his partner is nothing but mere infatuation. Do you really think somebody’s feelings are a negotiable item? Is it really for the happiness of the nubile that this distress is created?

Not to disrespect figures like parents but it is certainly not for the happiness of the child! People at any cost want to avoid any kind of anticipated scorn from their peers for their pride lies in being agreeable to their community members which gives them a feeling of highly acceptable and valued people of their society. This prestige is built upon not on the foundations of one’s own attitude and deeds but on the approval of theirs by the other members of the society. By convincing the child to follow the convention approved by their society the parents want to secure the social needs of their mind. Now the assurance to be able to derive the same mental satisfaction of being a recognized and responsible identity in the society is at stake, which brings out this kind of ‘reaction’ in the name of future concern of the nubile’s life. Pride is maintained by dignity and not acceptability!

Almost every person at some point must have encountered the question- why do you want to pursue this particular professional course? And the answer to this is always that the flair or forte of yours for the course made you decide to choose it. If we really think it’s not difficult for most of us to admit that we choose a career whose professionals are currently in high demand and hence compensated amply. Because the financial assurance of your future it gives is so strong, you never explore for your real career-match.

For humans assurances in every facet of life give a picture of secured future. Because of this aspect of human nature, most time of man is spent in thinking about the future and becoming anxious.  Only if you live in present you would rescue one from remaining preoccupied with future concerns. And thus few activities like playing, watching movies, drinking, etc. that cease your thoughts in present makes them the most sought out pursuits.

At times when people become frustrated with their worries they often exclaim to take ‘sanyas’ – salvation. However, the much misinterpreted word sanyas doesn't always mean to forsake the world and live in isolation. Essentially, sanyas is living life free from worries related to future events or past regrets. This happens when you live in the moment that has your physical presence-present. One way to achieve this is by stop running behind things with a motive of looking for guarantees in life. From the moment you leave behind thoughts evaluating certainties, you are in bliss.

                Moreover, if you always ensure that you stay in your comfort zone you will close doors for the surprise elements of life making it monotonous and unadventurous. Leave worries to let surprises enliven your way and wish yourself: A happy independence day!